122. Ellie Roozdar, 2nd Interview

Ellie RoozdarThis is my second interview with Ellie. You might want to listen to the first one before listening to this one.

Ellie is a happily married woman for 29 years. She has been blessed, with two beautiful children—a lovely daughter and a sweet son.

She has graduated from SUNY at Stony Brook and has been teaching mathematics in high school and community colleges. After changing her career, she worked in Information Technology as a Quality Assurance Manage for many years.

Since childhood, she was seeing herself as a vision, which was not associated with the body at all. The question was arising, “Who am I?” This was never answered and it was there in her heart for a long time…
Since the year 2001, she has been inspired:

  1. To get to know who she is
  2. To find what she is searching for

For the past few years, she has had wonderful experiences by “going within,” meditating and discovering the Truth. The Truth reveals itself to itself by itself.
She would like to share these experiences with you.
She hopes that by reading her story, you also get inspired to “go within” and “discover” who you really are, and also find the authentic joy that resides within.

This is simply a discovery, not to become anyone or anything. Remember: Joy is already there, it just needs to be uncovered.
We learn to go within and to be a witness of the “nothingness.” It may be frightening at the beginning. All our life we want to be somebody and add something to ourselves and now we will face “nothingness.”
She wishes you all patience and the best of luck on this path. Please know that this is the best thing and the most important thing that you can do for yourself.

You will be happy that you took time and discover your True Self.

Love and light!

The Skype sessions that I arrange with the seeker, if they are ready is as following:

“Walking meditation” is a Guided meditation, by closing the eyes and  have this journey within. Symbolically, hand in hand  walking together, to recognize and identify the Truthdirectly. The one and only Truth that which the silence/stillness is pointing to. The Truth that has been overlooked all along, will be recognized by itself. This is awakening.

Ellie’s website

First interview with Ellie

Interview recorded 5/12/2012

Video and audio below. Audio also available as a Podcast.

63 thoughts on “122. Ellie Roozdar, 2nd Interview

  1. Laurence –
    Not to worry – and of course emptiness is not the end state, but when people first awaken they do come to experience themselves as vast empty space…..They disidentify with the personal ME and gain identity with something greater – and more expansive..This emptiness can sometimes be misinterpreted as something flat or dull..and disappointing..
    but this is merely a stage in the natural dissolution process..a milestone to be sure…but not the totality of being…

    Acceptance of this emptiness as a milestone in one’s evolution and having gratitude for it – honoring it – is the best way to seduce it into showing us it’s true face and making it dance..

    Before this vast emptiness is recognized as pure unconditional love, this dissolution of the self – this emptying out of who we thought we were- must take place and it is often misunderstood..

    When Mother Teresa (according to her letters to her bishop) first encountered herself as emptiness, she was distraught…and bemoaned it – thought she had gone astray..She was expecting her God of Light and Love to appear..She didn’t know that the emptiness was Him in disguise…and died without finding what she desired..

    Our expectations of the spiritual journey sometimes conveniently leave out part of the necessary process of evolution..We want the light handed to us on a silver latter and are not usually willing to go through the darkness (the void) to see it..No one becomes a butterfly overnight…

    Who we truly are, as Neelam says, is space and tenderness at our core…They are one and the same, but it takes some time to come to that realization and fully embody all that it is….

  2. Jill – Thank you for this lovely and inspirational response – and just for the record, I was not trying to take issue with any of your former postings.
    All that you say about the feelings of emptiness that arise as the ego dissolves are in line with my experience also. What I find is that for me , the stages of awakening are not always clear cut or exactly sequential. There seems to be an ongoing carnival of different experiences, ranging from a few hours or so spent in the “wasteland,” to stability and centeredness, to the ecstatic inner Divine Presence, then maybe a brief go-round with irritability or impatience, and then back round again. These cycles run regularly, and as they continue, the “down cycles” seem to be losing steam and whatever negative thoughts occasionally pop up no longer cling for very long, i.e. sometimes only a few seconds.
    So yes, as many here point out, the awakening process happens differently for everybody. It seems like a journey, but is really just a falling away, until all that remains is Love and “fullness of being”(Maharishi Mahesh Yogi.)
    I also very much like what you say about honoring each experience or stage, and greeting them with a welcoming sense of gratitude.
    So anyway, yes, yes, and yes! Love, Grace, Fulfillment.
    How beautiful that is.

  3. Beautifully stated Laurence..and thank you for sharing yourself so honestly…that’s what people benefit from..that’s what satsang is..sitting in the presence of our own Truth…
    We hopefully leave the abstractions behind when we go on the final leg of the journey..and speak straight from the heart..
    yes yes – a falling away of everything that isn’t true -letting it all go – which some describe as the great unburdening of self -beautiful –
    and the more we can surrender and ride the waves between rest and restlessness – the more we are grateful for all that arises – knowing God is contained in the blocks as well as the bliss – the deeper the Love and the greater the freedom in the end..
    Love to you..

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